Tuesday, April 15, 2008
12:26 AM
Today actually find out that actually they all have been together.. I saw them holding hands walking into the basketball court haha kinda of dramatic lolx To be frank, if I say I didn't feel anything thats juz cheating myself. Kinda of funny the first thing I do is act like nth then continue playing bball when she on the court I dun look at her juz look at the ball and look at her movement not looking into her face at all haha is kinda of werid rite lolx. Till the end I didnt talk a single thing to both of them. I donno is I dun wish to say or I donno wat to say. Although I felt sad but not as sad as in the past maybe is like I already prepare for it. I donno y tt time she said tt to me and doing it like tt I rather she said it straight tt she doesnt like me and I will accept it but she didnt and it makes me feel tt her reason is juz a reason to tell me off... My fren ask me am I angry with them to be frank I wasnt I already expect its going to happen is juz tt I will feel better if they juz tell me rather than I find out myself. But I will respect her decision as that wat she wan. I will give them my blessing...
I didnt regret although I lose something but in return I gain sth also. Tt thing was wat I lose long ago, the care from frens, I really feel very happy as I feel the care like frm the past. Being together and care for each other. Maybe this is wat I get frm return and I think this might be the best way tt it had happen, although I donno how long will it last but at least I found back the long lose feeling that I always wanted it back so much. After the incident I really dare not dream or wish anymore I think I will grab hold of anything that I can and do watever I can and not by dream or wish for it anymore...
Conclusion... I really should not think so much as things always wont happen on my side the thing i should do is using my own strength. I dun dream so I dun wish I juz do wat I can from now on...
Sign off,
loner-y3u
